Dream Therapy, My Liposuctioned Buttocks!

Open letter to the annoying people in my recent dream:

If I am coughing to the point that I can’t speak, please ask me, "Can you breathe?"

Don’t yack on and on about whatever is passing through your head, using a "look at me when I’m talking to you, young [gender-specific noun]!" tone of voice.

My dream self would appreciate it. Thanks ever so.